I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
