So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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