if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
