you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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