Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize