You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
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