Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
where are you?
Hypothermia
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Drunk is a universal language darling
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