She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
