wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!