Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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