Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
