We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
