She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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