Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize