at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
