"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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