craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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