capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
