Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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