Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
