she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a kid would responsible me up
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize