Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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