Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize