I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I love having hate sex.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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