hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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