Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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