well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Michael Bay diarrhea
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
