I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
