So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
