Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
