so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
