i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
