I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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