Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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