Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I think I am morally bankrupt
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
