come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
