he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
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She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
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Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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