Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm too high and old for this...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize