He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize