I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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