she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize
