Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
