I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Bang-toberfest begins!!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
