Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
