All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
