I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
