I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
