now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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