If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
