Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
