She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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